High centered

You only belong to me in videos.

Here, pieces of you sing out to me like the sea
caught in a digital Conch shell.
I lift you out of the surf and
placing you near my cheek
crane my heart for every byte of your voice.

Your words pour out
drift out
lap out
and trickle down to my chin
past lips that can't decide if they want to curl up

or quiver.

taxi

i am a taxi driver

you are my tourist

welcome to my black and white

times new roman cab.

hop on in

split the fare with a vivid description

a memory of maryland

or a few scroungy lines

that do a terrible disservice

to the vibrant colors of fall

and the languishing uncertainties of those in between years.

theres plenty of room inside for you

and your baggage

so spread out.

do you know

just a day or so ago i was heading to the same address?

6402 memory lane

(you have your crafty tricks, i have mine!)

the open carport where the apples once sat

the only thing ripening now an f150.

there were fat logs chaotically arrayed under the tall oaks

the ones standing in a sort of a circle

like a grove of cool kids

passing around a cigarette.

i thought perhaps i saw a shy girl

tall for her age peeking around them

with wondering eyes

at an invisible boy who would surely have enjoyed

racing her brother down the hill on bicycles until one

or both

wore bloody limbs like

badges of honor

flush with the scent of adventure.

how warm a thought

and how bitter

to love a home and leave it.

Glove

cold weather is an old friend
she comes back after a while
and knows me well.
we tell secrets, and lies in spite
of however long it's been between visits
she fits like a glove.

out of the coal

out of the shit climbs a seed
dusts itself off
and becomes a tree
tree falls
squirrels, ants, rats crawl around in it
carry it away
tree rots
lies forgotten under its posterity
after
a
while
tree becomes coal
time
out of the coal climbs a diamond
dusts itself off
is you.

song- pennsylvania

pennsylvania

V1
corn is shoulder high and gardens spring to life
along a country road near meyersdale just north of
the mason dixon line i know it sounds cliche, but hey
this green place feels like it could be called home

just down the road two little churches stand together
twins, their steeples poking white holes in the blue sky
you and i declare the air is clean and clear as day and hey
this green place feels like it could be called home

CHORUS
but thats easy to say in pennsylvania
its just hard to explain
it aint easy to stay in pennsylvania
its just hard to walk away

V2
pickup trucks are limousines on saturday night
get your girl all prettied up a tshirt tux and steel toe boots
are all the rage, its been that way since ever since
back before i could remember

just down the road is mom and dads place
holidays just arent the same since they passed on
i wish i'd gone a few more times to say hello
the autumn sure is pretty- the winter's rough
but it still beats the city here

CHORUS
but thats easy to say in pennsylvania
its just hard to explain
it aint easy to stay in pennsylvania
its just hard to walk away

BRIDGE
so go on young man try to find yourself out there
you'll be back before its time to harvest corn
theres just somethin 'bout a july whiporwill
a lazy summer night can make you feel reborn

v3
the weeds are shoulder high and gardens cling to life
along a country lane near wellersburg just north of
the mason dixon line i know it sounds cliche, but hey
this green place feels like it could be called home

CHORUS
but thats easy to say in pennsylvania
its just hard to explain
it aint easy to stay in pennsylvania
its just hard to walk away

yea thats easy to say in pennsylvania
its just hard to explain
it aint easy to stay in pennsylvania
its just hard to walk away

Summer's Song

wrote this song waaay back in high school and just re-did it for acoustic guitar.

VIDEO:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=if18SFOqcdM

babe lets go for a ride
i promise to be good
if you let me drive
lets roll these windows down
and let the night in
this night is young
and so are we
no one can touch
the way i see
the road ahead or you
reclining smiling up at me

summers song is calling
i can hear it
in the wheels as they turn
lets forget yesterday and burn
summers song is calling
i can feel it in your wind blown hair
this car cant go fast enough

lets run away from here
to find ourselves we'll lose
our shadows and fear
lets leave the past behind
for a little while
yesterdays gone
tomorrow might never come
all we have is now
so make the most
of every second
press the pedal harder baby

summers song is calling
i can hear it
in the wheels as they turn
lets forget yesterday and burn
summers song is calling
i can feel it in your wind blown hair
this car cant go fast enough

summers song is calling
i can hear it
in the wheels as they turn
lets forget yesterday and burn
summers song is calling
i can feel it in your wind blown hair
this car cant go fast enough

cat.

you sneaky bastard
i wanted to disdain you
rue your existence
not let you nap on my chest.
i was hoping you would be
of a crabby disposition
playful/ affectionate
is not what i had in mind.
and when you fart
little kitten farts
and then jump with surprise
do you think thats so funny?
you, cat...
i am disgraced
that sharing my bed comes
so cheaply to you
a few mews
a few pats from padded paws
and my comfortable
bachelors existence
is invaded by a feline fatale.
and whats this?
why am i carrying you up the stairs...
ayayay i am finished.

*DUET* After goodbye

New song, watch the video!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x0Z-Ywd7l_Q&feature=channel_video_title


VERSE 1
Spent the day inside the house
counting shadows on the wall
I know this is what i wanted
but it ain't at all
They say vision is the clearest
lookin back at where you've come
but my blurry eyes can't focus
staring at the phone

CHORUS (male)
Cause girl it seems like every day
I think about you more, the way
you get inside my head and drive me crazy
drives me crazy
And just when I am thinking I am free
I find another way you get to me
Baby I remember all the ways I let you down
and I know
I can never be the one you wrap your arms around anymore
And baby I remember every teardrop in your eye
and I know now that I was wrong and you were right
But its too late for words and talk is cheap the night
after goodbye

VERSE 2
Daddy told me this would happen
Said that you'd leave me alone
He said I'd wind up broken hearted
staring at the phone

CHORUS
'Cause boy it seems like every day
I think about you more, the way
you get inside my heart and drive me crazy
drives me crazy
and just when I am thinking I am free
I find another way you get to me
Baby I remember all the times I let you down
and I know
I can never be the one you wrap your arms around anymore
and baby I remember every teardrop in your eye
and I know now that I was wrong and you were right
But it's too late for words and talk is cheap the night
after goodbye

BRIDGE
After goodbye
I thought I heard your voice
After goodbye
I thought I felt your touch
After goodbye
I never thought
I'd want you back this much

CHORUS
'Cause boy/ girl it seems like every day
I think about you more, the way
you get inside my head and drive me crazy
drives me crazy
And just when I am thinking I am free
I find another way you get to me
Baby I remember all the ways I let you down
and I know
I can never be the one you wrap your arms around anymore
and baby I remember every teardrop in your eye
and I know now that I was wrong and you were right
but it's too late for words and talk is cheap tonight
Yea it's too late for words and talk is cheap the night
after goodbye
after goodbye

TAG
Yea I know this is what i wanted
but it ain't at all...

prophets

at the edge of the ocean
i found an old man
who believed in the notion
that life isn't planned
that its moments are golden
and turn out the best
when you show up
and let god take care of the rest
he informed me that sunsets
and clouds in the sky
are more beautiful
left to the lens of the eye
that the wrinkles and lines
on his face by his eyes
were earned and awarded
and meant to be prized
we laughed about women
and exaggerated
the beauty and grace
of whom we'd consummated
as we parted i thought
of the wisdom he shared
of the hunch in his step
and the white in his hair
and decided that prophets
don't always deliver
their message in words
to the heart of the listener

Sweat and leather

Memories sometimes have the funniest ways of drawing themselves out of the abstract and into the tangible level of experience, or existence. There are many things about my dad that I remember; (I don't speak of him in the past tense because he is dead, but simply because since they are memories I will be telling you about, the moment is dead. The events have already happened. Ergo, past tense) The particular one that came bursting into my consciousness a few minutes ago though, is his smell. There are two smells I remember clearly and associate with him. The first is his visiting smell, and the second his travel smell. When he would visit, he drove a lot. He would visit us, but couldn't stay there so he would drive between our house, Aunt Maria's in PA, and my sister Tanya's place in VA. Dad drank a lot of coffee, so he had to pee a lot. Between that and having to buy gas anyway, he spent a lot of time in gas stations. It always seemed that when he would get out of the car and we would hug, I would be saturated with an unusual mixture of gasoline, cigarettes, coffee, and Honey Buns. It never failed. I used to think that this combination existed as a single unit, and it was just what his detergent smelled like or something. Only later did I discover that it was made up of individual components that helped one to better understand his personality. The gas because his inability to stay committed to anything necessitated moving. The cigarettes were a vice he enjoyed which he knew was bad for him but continued to do anyway because well, fuck the world. Coffee was added because he did so much and needed some kind of pick me up, and the Honey Buns were quick and easy. This is perhaps an oversimplification, but I feel like at the very worst it's not far off the mark. The second smell, his travel smell, was brought to mind as I detected it wafting off of my own body today at the airport. Anytime we would greet him at the airport or he would drive straight home after a trip, again at the hug there would be an instantly recognizable scent. This time, it was simpler- sweat, cologne/ deodorant, and leather. When I got off the plane in Tokyo after 13 hours of flying, it all came back. I was wearing the same style of leather shoes he would always be wearing, and his suitcase was leather. I had been stuck in a seat for a day, so I was sweaty. And I had stopped in the men's room to try and mask the smell with a quick grab into my toiletry bag. I thought about all the places he had flown, only in the cockpit. Of all the airport announcements about unclaimed luggage he had heard, how many flight attendants had served him peanuts or pretzels, how many times he had said “Flight attendants please be seated for arrival”. It was a little surreal. The day you realize just how close to the proverbial tree your proverbial apple has fallen is an interesting one. And then you start to realize it in little ways, all the time. Despite not being there for most of my growing up years, he somehow influenced and shaped a huge part of who I am. I find it impossible to resist regularly stopping for a cup of coffee anytime I drive more than half a mile. I've been known to smoke one or two when I get really stressed. I have terrible eating habits. I wear the same leather boot-shoes, sweat like a mother and yet feel impressions are important enough to dress it up even when my arrival is in the dead of night and I KNOW I'm going to look a fright regardless. And you know what, I think I'm OK with all that. I am what I am. Don't get me wrong, I know There’s always room for improvement and every day I think what an idiot I was the day before. But that's the details part. The big picture? Life goes on, and it often goes on in the tracks of the generations before. This one's for you dad.